• About

Kayla's Only Heart

~ Always learning. Always progressing.

Kayla's Only Heart

Tag Archives: light

Meeting Autumn

03 Sunday Nov 2019

Posted by KaylasOnlyHeart in Poetry/Lyrics, Uncategorized

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

autumn, beauty, believe, cleanse, doubt, dream, fall, forward, hope, leaves, light, love, poem, poetry, rain, seasons, sun

autumn dream

 

The rain falls before

the trees set aflame

a fresh cleansing

for love’s claim

 

For sunlight’s ease

shortens like the days

but remains steady

through this phase

 

The light awoke up

made us believe dreams

fears retreated, doubts cleared

and reality ripped seams

 

As we shift seasons

taking a step forward

we shed a dead layer

knowing what we move toward

 

Lively green sets aflame

beauty before death crunches

a shedding, a preparing

for fruit’s new bunches

 

 

 

 

September 23/24, 2019

Sand Castle

05 Tuesday Feb 2019

Posted by KaylasOnlyHeart in Poetry/Lyrics, Uncategorized

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

hope, light, neglect, poem, poetry, truth

So good raising me

all bad was beyond

you had no effect

on the young mold

 

Now I wonder

where the base is

did it exist

or was it sold

 

the leaking cracks

must be my fault

for not speaking

left alone in the cold

 

Today this distance

lacks a bridge

no apologies owed

is what I’m told

 

Nothing new here

I see light

where you see sand

standing with you, I fold

 

So I take a step

no matter how small

I grow hope in truth

my real base takes hold

Thoughtful Thursday: Prison Mates in The Count of Monte Cristo

10 Thursday Jan 2019

Posted by KaylasOnlyHeart in books, The Great American Reader, Uncategorized

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

books, company, despair, Great American Read, hope, light, pit, presence, strength, support, The Count of Monte Cristo, The Great American Reader

In The Count of Monte Cristo, Edmond Dantes eventually discovers he has a neighbor in a nearby cell. The dungeon has left him darkness and pulled his hope into despair. Yet not long before fulfilling his idea to starve himself, he hears a tapping sound that renews his hope. That day he eats again. Then he also starts chipping at his own wall, slowly making a passage to connect to his neighbor’s. Knowing he doesn’t suffer alone gives him hope and strength to move forward.

Once the prisoners succeed with their adjoining tunnel, they meet. Instantly, their hopes improve. Faria even literally steps into the sliver of light shining through the small window in Dantes’ cell as Dantes casts his first glance upon his new friend. As they learn they can trust each other, they begin to make plans. Faria shares his plethora of history and language knowledge. Eventually, they renew their efforts to escape their prison.

People often compare the darkness of mental illness as a pit, and people often feel stuck in what seems like a prison not unlike the one where Dantes and Faria find themselves. Yet when they join each other, their hope renews. They don’t bring the misunderstanding, accusations or judgment their guards have cast on them unhelpfully but bring company. The simple presence gives the possibility of trust. Outside the pages, we often forget to begin with this step when someone we love falls into the pit. Joining the friend shows they don’t suffer alone and serves as a starting point for giving them a safe place to share their struggles as Dantes and Faria share their backgrounds with each other as a way to form understanding. Then, sharing knowledge and support, we can work together to find a way back into the light.

 

Book Review: Fiercehearted

16 Sunday Dec 2018

Posted by KaylasOnlyHeart in books, Uncategorized

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

authenticity, book review, books, Christian living, Fiercehearted, God, Holley Gerth, life, light, truth, vulnerable

I recently read Holley Gerth’s Fiercehearted: Live Fully, Love Bravely with my friend Stacie.

I now feel like Holley Gerth is a kindred spirit even though we’ve never met. This book has short chapters that all share a vulnerable, authentic voice and a unique light. Gerth has a perspective on her life that allows her to see God in the seemingly ordinary details of her life, and this allows her to learn from her experiences. As she invites readers into these situations, they too can grow closer to God and recall similar times in their own lives. Gerth’s unassuming openness welcomes readers into a life lived in the light. Now I feel like I can walk with a more confident step.

I highly recommend this book and highly look forward to the next book of hers I read. Fortunately, I’ve got a few on my shelf waiting for me!

Craving Higher Hopes

27 Sunday Aug 2017

Posted by KaylasOnlyHeart in Poetry/Lyrics, Uncategorized

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

authenticity, comfort, connection, daydream, desire, hope, identity, inspiration, light, love, poem, poetry, presence, relationship, safe, self, smile

no money, no rent

no way to meet ends

yet you daydream away

hoping somebody else tends

 

a day laid in bed

a blanket blocking out

no light streaming in

inspiration to move about

 

until I’m invited again

a smile lift lips

as you start to arise

head resting on my hips

 

my lap brings comfort

the presence you need

to embrace the real you

as that desire you feed

 

a connecting you bring

to go deeper you crave

what you hold dearly

you still can save

 

 

July 20, 2017

Chester Bennington

26 Saturday Aug 2017

Posted by KaylasOnlyHeart in Poetry/Lyrics, Uncategorized

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

belonging, Chester Bennington, depression, faith, hope, hopeless, hopelessness, life, light, Linkin Park, mind, music, poem, poetry, sad, sadness, success, suicide

listening back now

seems so hard to miss

that deep felt desire

for life more than this

 

so how did we not

see that darkness filling

what light was left

as hope went spilling

 

radio plays nonstop

an endless tribute stream

what now seems proof

in that musical scream

 

let us not forget

the reality of those songs

as hopelessness expresses

it feels it belongs

 

success matters not

when the mind does miss

a light, a hope, a faith

to make life worth this

Meetings Follow-Up

22 Monday Feb 2016

Posted by KaylasOnlyHeart in Journal, Uncategorized

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

12 Steps, action, Celebrate Recovery, Christian, Christian living, clouds, encouragement, flowers, forgiveness, healing, hope, hurt, Lent, light, recovery, support

This week has started well, especially as I mentioned the importance of meetings in my last post. I made it to church yesterday morning and my support group this evening. As I’ve ventured out from my dip in isolation, I’ve found several supportive peers and friends eager to see me and encourage me. Tonight especially, I was repeatedly reminded that I need not travel this healing road alone and that sharing my struggle (as well as my victory) frees me and opens the lane for others coming down the same road; the content of the lesson on principle 8 associated with the twelfth step in the 12 Steps, which focuses on sharing God’s word and work by example, and a personalized word of encouragement from a woman who shares a similar experience as me have made me realize a truth that’s been on my heart: I need to continue forgiving and sharing my hurts, habits and hang-ups. I NEED to take this action.

Fortunately this action can make use of my spiritual gifts of writing, encouragement and teaching…and that’s just from sharing it via writing. Here’s to sharing my recovery journey, me seeing my healing and others seeing God’s light shining in and through it.

20160213_223239

20160220_165648

 

Lent Reflection: Meetings

18 Thursday Feb 2016

Posted by KaylasOnlyHeart in Essay, Journal, Uncategorized

≈ 1 Comment

Tags

Celebrate Recovery, Christian, Christian living, Christianity, church, community, depression, fasting, focus, friends, God, grace, growth, healing, hope, Jesus, Lent, light, meetings, perspective, recovery, scripture, stability, structure

Lent started just over a week ago, and today I start a new project of sorts to give me a better focus on God during this special time (yes, it’s okay to start late). Rather than fast from a particular food or activity during this season, I typically carve out some extra time to focus on God by using my spiritual gift of encouragement. This project I’ve mentioned involves taking that in a different direction. I plan to carve out time a couple times each week to reflect on my healing, how God has fulfilled it. For me, that is best done through writing or journaling (which I already do on a daily basis in the interest of maintaining my overall health).

The past couple weeks, I’ve contemplated the importance of regular meetings. “Meeting” can allude to an array of subjects to discuss at said gatherings. While I have noticed that having regular meeting times provides my life more structure and meaning, I have also contemplated the effect of regular meeting times for worship and community with God’s family.

In college, I found it easier to manage my symptoms of depression, anxiety and PTSD.  I created a routine and stuck to it, successfully accomplishing my goals to regularly exercise, pray, have mealtimes with friends, maintain my leadership position at Campus Christian Fellowship, attend worship services throughout the week and complete my school work and projects. I felt good about these tasks and my activities; I felt connected and enriched. I could see my growth. I have only recently noticed the pattern of meeting in the context of worship and spiritual growth having a significant role in keeping my focus and perspective on track. I was regularly reminded of Scripture and how God’s love fulfills it on a daily basis. I also met with a counselor and mentor to help me apply that to my life to keep my focus on the light rather than the darkness that tends to hover around me. All those meetings took up a considerable amount of time, but they made it possible for me to continue moving forward, and, most importantly, in the light.

The transition from college to the so-called “real world” can prove rough for everyone. Fortunately, I know I am not alone. Several friends have shared my struggle in finding a meaningful job or selecting the direction they want to take their careers. Transition of any sort has its difficulties. I just can’t help but see the importance and benefit of transitioning into more meetings to maintain the structure and stability of corporate worship and community. Even someone at a recent support group meeting mentioned how attending three different support groups every week for a while made it possible for her to step away from her destructive path; she even emphasized that continuing to attend meetings (this is more than fifteen years later) keeps her on that track. Sadly, as this same person shared, she’s been around long enough to see people get sober from drugs for years and then go back once they stop attending meetings. We all need constant meetings to keep our focus and accountability in perspective.

That brings me to a new goal. The past several weeks, I have adjusted my schedule to make it easier for me to regularly attend the church service where I feel most comfortable and the Celebrate Recovery program I feel most at home. Even a couple weeks of attending both meetings gave me a better structure and a sense of stability to keep me on track to progress my healing. I know I will add more meetings, but that gives me a good start. I can also rest assured that both those meetings maintain a focus on God’s grace and love.

 

Lent is a time to fast and focus. God can use focus and perspective through meetings to keep us on track. What meeting can you commit to attending, even just during Lent to give your time to improve your relationship with God and your life?

 

Love’s Glow

21 Tuesday Apr 2015

Posted by KaylasOnlyHeart in Poetry/Lyrics

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

collide, fate, Haiku, light, love, NaPoWriMo, poem, poetry, true love

Lightbulb without spark

Hasn’t brightened since that day

Our fates collided 

Darkness Attacks

07 Tuesday Apr 2015

Posted by KaylasOnlyHeart in Poetry/Lyrics

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

anxiety, battle, darkness, depression, Haiku, heart, light, poem, poetry, shame

Take my shameful heart

Expose long-lasting attack 

Conquer the darkness

← Older posts

Enter your email address to follow this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

Join 896 other followers

You can't make advances if you don't take chances. These posts share my perspectives of my journey as I step forward, walking in the Light.

Recent Posts

  • Book Review: The Flatshare
  • Book Review: The Southern Book Club’s Guide to Slaying Vampires
  • Recommended Reading: February 5, 2021
  • Book Review: Marilla of Green Gables
  • Book Review: Because of Winn-Dixie

Categories

  • Beauty
  • books
  • Essay
  • Journal
  • Monday Motivation
  • Photography
  • Playlists
  • Poetry/Lyrics
  • Reading Recommendations
  • The Great American Reader
  • Uncategorized
  • Winsome Women Wednesday

RSS my weekly nail creations

  • Starlit Darkness 
              As it felt like I continued to fall deeper into darkness, I reminded myself to keep dreaming positively. My stars matched my pajamas to encourage my sleeping dreams as well.  The following weekend I ventured out with my friends to attend a Taking Back Sunday and The Used concert. Surrounding […]
    KaylasOnlyHeart
  • Falling
          These plain manicures go back to the fall. The season marked a time of change and a new look at my world. Perhaps the perspective in what I held in my hands stole some of the focus and expression I would normally have for my nail art.  I went from a bold […]
    KaylasOnlyHeart
  • Plain Sparkles
    After the Top Shelf plain manicure, I had another plain one with some sparkles added. I just didn’t feel spirited enough to enjoy my me time. I still made myself go through the motions though. I might not have been applying makeup regularly, but I kept my nails polished. The little touches kept me from […]
    KaylasOnlyHeart

Facebook

Facebook

Twitter Updates

  • I read Bird by Bird by Anne Lamott goodreads.com/review/show?id… 4 hours ago
  • Just posted a photo @ Bowling Green, Kentucky instagram.com/p/CNlKWS2rJhF/… 22 hours ago
  • 4 of 5 stars to Evvie Drake Starts Over by Linda Holmes goodreads.com/review/show/28… 22 hours ago
  • “Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.” Galatians 6:9 #mondaythoughts 1 day ago
  • @XBowXl8 Just don't ask me to decide if I like it better than Beach Read. 😉 1 day ago
Follow @KaylasOnlyHeart

Goodreads

No Instagram images were found.

RSS Pendey in Kensia

  • An error has occurred; the feed is probably down. Try again later.

Blog Stats

  • 9,796 hits

Blog Stats

  • 9,796 hits

Create a free website or blog at WordPress.com.

Cancel

 
Loading Comments...
Comment
    ×
    Privacy & Cookies: This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this website, you agree to their use.
    To find out more, including how to control cookies, see here: Cookie Policy