Tag Archives: growth

Monday Motivation: Isn’t It Romantic

18 Monday Feb 2019

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The new romantic comedy Isn’t It Romantic might parody the genre, but it also hints at a truth behind a detail to which Rebel Wilson’s character Natalie initially scoffs. Though arguably unrealistic, romantic comedies remind us of the magic surrounding us. Sure, we may see more of the dull, hard work the movies don’t show, but we do possess a hope to find what we seek. Those desires for romance and fulfillment come naturally, and we have the power to step forward and progress those goals (with some reflection and work of course). Ultimately, we see that life offers more than what we notice everyday.

Natalie wakes up in a romantic comedy where her surroundings seem too good to pass as real. She comments how New York no longer stinks and how it looks as thought it had a beauty filter over it. Flowers surround her as she walks the streets, and people look her in the eye because they notice her. These details can happen outside a romantic comedy. Maybe actual flower arrangements don’t adorn every doorway and table, but beauty exists around us; a stranger or even a loved one can reflect God’s face as they take the time to notice and listen to us. Sometimes a potential love or job we want might stand right in front of us, simply waiting for us to recognize it and step toward it. Looking through a positive lens of hope rather than one of disappointment allows that.

We all desire romance, and that doesn’t mean we live with our head in the clouds. Our hearts naturally long for intimacy, and we see proof of that beauty throughout the bible. Song of Songs expresses the more physical side, and numerous New Testament passages demonstrate the benefits of marriage union and community. Like Natalie eventually discovers in Isn’t It Romantic, we can accept these desires rather than scoff at them. Perhaps the acknowledgement leads to fulfilling them. We possess a hope that brings a romantic comedy like magic to our ordinary lives.

 

 

I thoroughly enjoyed this movie, especially with its Valentine’s Day timing. It proved my philosophy that love does surround us in all its cheesy and intense ways, whether culturally accepted as realistic or not.

 

For further reading, I recommend this Christianity Today article that describes a hope often overlooked in romantic comedies.

The Great American Reader: Harry Potter – Ask Questions

08 Friday Feb 2019

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Harry Potter lives with his aunt, uncle and cousin after witnessing his parents’ deaths as an infant. The Dursleys provide the worst home environment imagination. Mostly ignored, Harry sleeps in the cupboard under the stairs with spiders, the other unwanted species in the house. He learns early that his adoptive family does not welcome questions. Early on, the book notes, “Don’t ask questions – that was the first rule for a quiet life with the Dursleys.” Harry first realizes this when he asks Aunt Petunia about the scar on his forehead and only finds out the truth later from a stranger. Though they may bring up uncomfortable conversations, questions play a crucial role in developing relationships as well as forming an identity and values.

Harry’s aunt and uncle deny him a lot more than his physical needs. They neglect him as a person, and provide him not only no familial bonds but no sense of himself either. Wondering what happened to his parents leaves a gap in Harry’s heart. The brush offs regarding his questions do not give him a route to learn about his own history, let alone forge his own identity. They also do not ask him questions, making it easy to gloss over the fact that they do not give Harry what he needs as a child. When they don’t ask if he got enough food after losing half his meal, they don’t have to acknowledge he may go hungry.

These scenarios play out in everyday life too. Rather than ask for more details, we assume someone can manage just fine. Not knowing someone could use help makes it easier to tell ourselves we don’t need to offer any. Guessing the answer to someone’s question or brushing it off as unimportant invites shame or distances trust because that person hears they struggle with a task simple to everyone else. Instead of pushing off the discomfort, let’s welcome the potential to grow from questions. Sorting through the answers can launch numerous positive aspects like a stronger sense of self, a deeper bond between the people discussing and a higher level of understanding.

Top 10 Books I Read in 2018

01 Tuesday Jan 2019

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Happy New Year! As we begin a fresh calendar year, I want to share my top reads from 2018. That way we can start our reading lists with good titles and a reminder of the plethora of wonderful reads awaiting us.

 

  1. How to Walk Away by Katherine Center: This book follows a woman my age as she finishes her MBA program. As she anticipates starting her new job and accepting her fiancé’s proposal, her dreams literally go up in flames in a plane crash. Margaret must learn to heal physically, emotionally and mentally as she learns a new way of life and builds new dreams. Talk about a reminder of human resiliency. This book demonstrates hope and holds a wonderful sweetness.
  2. Wonder by R.J. Palacio: This read also reminds readers of human strength. It proves the power of kindness, especially in small actions. Little boy August constantly deals with obstacles in life, some seen by others and some not. He faces ridicule and misunderstanding by his peers, but he maintains strength in character. I highly recommend to readers of all ages as we all need to show more kindness.
  3. This Must Be the Place by Maggie O’Farrell: A complicated family tale, this story delves into the depths of familial relationships. Daniel Sullivan encounters tragedy and triumph as he navigates his life and looks back on his mistakes and accomplishments. Through it all, we see the core of a family and how it holds together, sometimes in unexpected ways.
  4. To All the Boys I’ve Loved Before by Jenny Han: This YA gem hits the mark! It makes such a sweet, fun story, and it even introduces a character with a Korean background. Not to mention, it involves a teenage girl with admirable qualities (I find it especially refreshing to see a realistic and innocent perspective on sex). The book takes you to the thrills of high school while also exploring the angst and growth experienced during that sometimes tumultuous time. *The movie did a great job capturing all this on screen too. I’d consider Peter for a Valentine nominee this year.
  5. The Writing Desk by Rachel Hauck: This has introduced me to Hauck, and I wholeheartedly look forward to reading more of her books (I have a couple in my birthday book stack). The story goes back and forth in time between two young women embarking on writing careers and struggling to find mutual understanding with their mothers. Each one faces obstacles and yearns to stay true to her values and to develop her faith. The issues are relatable, and the women likeable.
  6. Circe by Madeline Miller: Circe serves as my pleasant surprise for the year. Getting my first deeper look into Greek mythology, I find myself more interested after reading this book. The themes of isolation, abandonment, love, connection and more play out in unique ways. I have enjoyed getting pulled into such a different story and learning some of the characters’ background.
  7. The Woman in the Window by A.J. Finn: Finn’s debut also goes outside my typical realm as it fits into the mystery/thriller category. However, to my appreciation, this book doesn’t involve gory violence or other sick scenarios. In an homage to Hitchcock style movies, it explores the real pitfalls of isolation and mental health. It sends a positive message of the importance of connection. Now I want to watch some of the movies that inspired Finn.
  8. Things You Save in a Fire by Katherine Center: A release coming later this year, Center’s next book continues her sweet stories with positive outlooks. It explores building new relationships and forgiving people who have caused significant harm. Again, it reminds us of the power of human connection and a strength and hope to move forward.
  9. Fiercehearted by Holley Gerth: Gerth feels like a kindred spirit in her devotional style book with short chapters. Each anecdote carries such an authentic tone, and she has a unique perspective always open to learning. Seemingly ordinary details in life become opportunities to grow. She reminds me that God speaks to us at all times, willing to guide us at every step.
  10. Anne of Green Gables by L.M. Montgomery: I can now say I’ve read this classic, and I love it. Anne has such a contagious positive outlook on life. Orphaned and learning from her adoptive mom Marilla how to lead a more civilized life, Anne’s imagination both gets her into trouble and keeps her head up. She takes her lessons in stride and makes so much progress.

 

Cheers to another great year of reading!

Book Review: The Sound of Rain

04 Tuesday Dec 2018

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I received a copy of Sarah Loudin Thomas’s The Sound of Rain from Bethany House in exchange for a review.

This novel follows a similar structure and theme as numerous other Christian historical fiction stories. While that makes it comforting to follow Judd and Larkin as they both move toward facing fears in their life to find and follow God’s purpose for their lives, it hits the mark sometimes. Part of this might come from the biggest transformation happening in a secondary character when you expect the protagonists to experience the most growth. Larkin’s father serves as both an obstacle to Larkin pursuing her dreams due to his anger and disapproval as well as the person who overcomes those obstacles. His experience indicates a significant change whereas Larkin’s seems more like a revelation. She and Judd both do overcome real obstacles and face difficulties, but they don’t come across as the strong focus.

Despite the sometimes confusing plot structure, the situations still hold relatable content and good lessons. Trust, fear and understanding all play out as the characters struggle to relate to each other while pursuing their direction. Ultimately, the cast demonstrates a tangible hope for reconciliation and healing.

 

 

If you enjoy reading books that have holiday scenes this time of year, this book has a Thanksgiving scene, a Christmas morning and a November wedding. Yet it doesn’t exclusively take place during that time. It gives a nice taste of the holiday spirit without being a Christmas themed story.

Slow to Speak

02 Sunday Dec 2018

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It’s easy you see

to spot my needs

name that change

toss those seeds

 

It’s hard to plant

in infertile ground

growth needs more

in  order to abound

 

Faith gives more

than surface deep,

knows heart’s deceit

yet a hope can keep

 

So consider needs

for a fruitful life

stay slow to speak

to avoid more strife

 

We all know Job

and his friends

who spoke no truth

through limited lens

 

Hurt is complex

builds strong roots

consider the depth

shaking in my boots

 

You speak no harm

when you listen

let the trust come

as tears glisten

 

Then you can see

how to adjust

what fruit comes

after the dust

Gaining Independence and Staying In Dependence on God

05 Wednesday Jul 2017

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Yesterday we celebrated Independence Day. Since my situation encountered another change recently, I found myself contemplating my own independence. Specifically, I considered how much independence fits a healthy lifestyle. I saw a blurb from a Christian resource pointing readers to remain in dependence on God. That reminder got me thinking about leaning on God, my family, friends and community.

I tend to isolate myself. That stems from a way I’ve coped with difficulties that started in childhood, and I’ve had to work on rerouting that habit. While good results arise from me wanting to take care of myself and my physical needs, I can take care of my spiritual and mental needs only to a point. Well, even my physical needs require me to seek help. I just have a hard time asking for help. Yet it’s there. I do not need to isolate myself; that only tends to worsen the situation. Somehow I forget I truly do have a team of people who care about me and whose relationships have proven fruitful for me (and them). God created us to depend on Him as well as live in community.

As I contemplate my next step for my career and my focus on my physical, mental and spiritual health, I seek to regain more of my independence again in terms of taking care of myself. Yet I also want to remind myself that part of that responsibility involves asking for help and seeking resources. Wherever I end up, I can lean on God and my community near and far.

Lent Reflection: Meetings

18 Thursday Feb 2016

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Lent started just over a week ago, and today I start a new project of sorts to give me a better focus on God during this special time (yes, it’s okay to start late). Rather than fast from a particular food or activity during this season, I typically carve out some extra time to focus on God by using my spiritual gift of encouragement. This project I’ve mentioned involves taking that in a different direction. I plan to carve out time a couple times each week to reflect on my healing, how God has fulfilled it. For me, that is best done through writing or journaling (which I already do on a daily basis in the interest of maintaining my overall health).

The past couple weeks, I’ve contemplated the importance of regular meetings. “Meeting” can allude to an array of subjects to discuss at said gatherings. While I have noticed that having regular meeting times provides my life more structure and meaning, I have also contemplated the effect of regular meeting times for worship and community with God’s family.

In college, I found it easier to manage my symptoms of depression, anxiety and PTSD.  I created a routine and stuck to it, successfully accomplishing my goals to regularly exercise, pray, have mealtimes with friends, maintain my leadership position at Campus Christian Fellowship, attend worship services throughout the week and complete my school work and projects. I felt good about these tasks and my activities; I felt connected and enriched. I could see my growth. I have only recently noticed the pattern of meeting in the context of worship and spiritual growth having a significant role in keeping my focus and perspective on track. I was regularly reminded of Scripture and how God’s love fulfills it on a daily basis. I also met with a counselor and mentor to help me apply that to my life to keep my focus on the light rather than the darkness that tends to hover around me. All those meetings took up a considerable amount of time, but they made it possible for me to continue moving forward, and, most importantly, in the light.

The transition from college to the so-called “real world” can prove rough for everyone. Fortunately, I know I am not alone. Several friends have shared my struggle in finding a meaningful job or selecting the direction they want to take their careers. Transition of any sort has its difficulties. I just can’t help but see the importance and benefit of transitioning into more meetings to maintain the structure and stability of corporate worship and community. Even someone at a recent support group meeting mentioned how attending three different support groups every week for a while made it possible for her to step away from her destructive path; she even emphasized that continuing to attend meetings (this is more than fifteen years later) keeps her on that track. Sadly, as this same person shared, she’s been around long enough to see people get sober from drugs for years and then go back once they stop attending meetings. We all need constant meetings to keep our focus and accountability in perspective.

That brings me to a new goal. The past several weeks, I have adjusted my schedule to make it easier for me to regularly attend the church service where I feel most comfortable and the Celebrate Recovery program I feel most at home. Even a couple weeks of attending both meetings gave me a better structure and a sense of stability to keep me on track to progress my healing. I know I will add more meetings, but that gives me a good start. I can also rest assured that both those meetings maintain a focus on God’s grace and love.

 

Lent is a time to fast and focus. God can use focus and perspective through meetings to keep us on track. What meeting can you commit to attending, even just during Lent to give your time to improve your relationship with God and your life?

 

One Forest

10 Tuesday Feb 2015

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A pale moon still glows 
Daylight bringing new
Dreams from sleep possible

I awoke closer to you 
Thoughts bridging gaps
Night and day become one

Shadows cast on me 
Only emphasize what’s left
Those few green branches 

What otherwise seems bare
Simply waits to grow
Needles, flowers, leaves emerge 

Reaching out, reaching up
I connect tree to tree
One forest of growth

Flashback Friday: “Bigger Than My Body” Above The Pavement

04 Friday Apr 2014

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We all want to soar when it comes to life to dreams to love. In “Bigger Than My Body,” John Mayer declares, “Someday I’ll fly/Someday I’ll soar/Someday I’ll be/So damn much more/’Cause I’m bigger than my body/Gives me credit for.” Let us not forget that we have the ability to soar and that others possess this potential as well. Keeping this bigger picture in mind helps us reach our goals and encourage others as well.

Often times we hold ourselves back because, simply, it’s easier to accept the status quo. Most people understand that the rock stars we hear on the radio, the anchors we see on TV, the best-selling authors we read exemplify rare cases. Yet the poets who share their pieces with writing communities online also find success. They take the first step toward flight. Maybe it leads to a full-blown writing career. Then again, it might never lead to any published work. Emerging from their shell, no matter how slowly, marks the path to success.

Mayer points out the possibility that “Maybe I’ll tangle in the power lines.” Lifting ourselves from our foundation involves more risk. Obstacles surround us overhead, and the solid pavement remains below. It provides stable ground, but it also hurts as a landing spot after a tumble. The firm aspect serves as the core or the heart of the quest, the “more to learn.” We can always stand on this soil.

Then we can “shed this skin I’ve been tripping in/never to quite return.” For we continually change as we grow into our new found successes, even if that entails healing from scrapes or bruises along the way. Let’s stretch our wings as they allow to see how we soar. Remember there is always more than what meets the eye as we don’t see one’s full reach in one glance.