Misery loves its company, and those demons in the back of my head try so hard to accompany me in my depression. The more time I spend alone, the stronger their presence. I need moments to myself to recharge, but my current situation calls for a rearrangement of such occasions. I have to take extra effort to surround myself with my supportive friends and to sort through my closet of thoughts (in public places). Strangers and close friends alike form my support group. All I need to do is knit them together to keep me wrapped in goodness.
Right now, I’m sipping coffee at the Dunkin Donuts across the bridge from my apartment. I have taken advantage of people who care about me and the comfort of strangers’ presence this evening. A friend from church met me for coffee to discuss our mutual struggle and to encourage me to keep utilizing my positive coping skills, particularly writing and exercising. I called my brother while I ate dinner, and he gave me that final push I needed to face the cold weather to get here. Now I sit under the florescent lights and predominantly orange walls turning my words into action. The radio plays peppy Top 40 music while the workers take care of their closing routine behind the counter. Those simple sounds remind me I am not alone.
All I’ve needed to do is take advantage of these people and places readily available to me. My church friend, brother, and numerous close friends have reminded me that I can call on them any time. My friends even put together two birthday dinners in honor of my birthday last weekend, because they love me and walk alongside me. I simply need to coax myself into making those contacts when I’m down (and in general) to keep me in community. Then I can take a short trip down the road to meet my thoughts in a public place where I can discuss them on paper. Now I really know I won’t be alone.
These people and places alone don’t “cure” my depression, but they give me a starting point. It takes constant effort to progress, and I still aim for a lot of goal fulfillment in the near future. Taking care of my foundation and basics will make it possible to tackle the rest. I know I am meant to live in community, meaning with other people and not the depressing demons who threaten to haunt me. I am a little more needy than usual right now, but I trust that my interactions and writing still serve purpose. In misery’s company, we still find goodness in community.